 Wednesday, May 18th 2005 - [300]A Picnic in the Park (15 of 24)
Original Commentary
"That's really kind of you" is a much more sincere phrase than it would be if Brisbane used "nice" or any other adjective. I wanted him to sound so sincere. I should do that more; especially with Jeff. Jeff is supposed to project an effortless and constant sincerity. Also, I had originally planned on David going up to Emily, Emily hugs him, and Jane escapes. But the punchline was along the lines of Emily talking about how she pays attention to David while ignoring him. It just seemed too cartoony - Terrence
Modern Commentary
Two comics ago, David says he was going to ask Emily where the extra croissants were. That's why he's answering Brisbane's question like that. I kinda wish we had made that a bit clearer in this specific comic, though.
The general idea was that Emily and Kimberly, who are officially "friends", can't stand each other while their boyfriends get along swimmingly. I like the juxtaposition, but that's not a lot of material to work with. And it doesn't answer questions like "What kind of guy is David?".
He's not really making a big impact here, unfortunately.
- Terrence
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